Dec 25, 2004

Merry Christmas!

...or whatever it is you celebrate. However your religion, customs, or beliefs may differ from mine, I hope that all of you get to spend time with loved ones during the holidays, and that's something that we can all celebrate together.

This, I believe, is the first Christmas I haven't really wanted anything. Sure, I want a laptop, and "someday", and a car, and a license, but I'm not expecting any of those. With my sister gone most of the year, and my dad flying in and out between here and Argentina, what I wanted most in the world, family, I got. Having all six of us (my mom, dad, sister, and both dogs) together gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling inside. I ended up with a movie and a hat (from Argentina, no less), but this Christmas, the best present of all was my family.

Merry Christmas, folks.

Dec 19, 2004

What?

Close2Home: ok
Close2Home: hey-
Close2Home: wait a sec
Close2Home: ok nevermind lol

Talk about short-term memory.

Dec 13, 2004

Finally, Another "10" List

10 Ways You Know You're Superman:
(topic submitted by Blake Gilson)

1. You own a pair of non-prescription glasses.

2. People call you "Smallville".

3. Standing in the sun is like a quadruple-shot of espresso.

4. You are attracted to young reporters with alliterated names.

5. Emeralds give you headaches.

6. All of your clothes are about ten sizes too tight.

7. You frequently wear your underwear outside your pants.

8. Phonebooths and revolving doors give you an urge to rip off your shirt.

9. You can fly.

10. You don't need to imagine what girls would look like without clothes on...

Dec 10, 2004

Hope


"When you want it the most there's no easy way out,
When you're ready to go and your heart's left in doubt,
Don't give up on your faith;
Love comes to those who believe it,
And that's the way it is."

I feel...hope.

Good things happen every once in a while, miracles occur, luck can be good too, tomorrow's only a day away, cookies come eventually, it's all worth it, serendipity is real, I'm on the right path, I AM appreciated (thank you Rachel and Iris), I have good friends, I have a specific really good friend, the end is in sight, "love comes to those who believe it...
...And that's the way it is."

Nov 29, 2004

Wow.

"Beautiful girls have the power of promise. They have the power of giving guys hope even when every single thing that goes wrong does go wrong. It's all there: their eyes, their smile, their hair, their hair, their pose, and everything that makes them who they are. They are there to make guys feel good about the everyday-hand-me-down problems that just seem to flow from one generation to another."

-Beautiful Girls

Just...wow. No words can really describe it, but that's the closest I can get. Wow.

Nov 26, 2004

US History CAN Be Fun!

From my US History textbook, page 333:

"Among the longest-lived sects were the Shakers. Led by Mother Ann Lee, they began in the 1770s to set up the first of a score or so of relgious communities. The Shakers attained a membership of about six thousand in 1840, but since their monastic customs prohibited both marriage and sexual relations, they were virtually extinct by 1940."

Oh, sweet irony.

Nov 18, 2004

School Answering Machine Message

I got this via email. It's hilarious; no wonder some people were offended:

This is the message that the Pacific Palisades High School (California)
Staff voted unanimously to record on their school telephone answering
machine. This came about because they implemented a policy requiring
students and parents to be responsible for their children's absences and
missing homework.

The school and teachers are being sued by parents who want their
children's failing grades changed to passing grades even though those
children were absent 15-30 times during the semester and did not
complete enough school work to pass their classes.

This is the actual answering machine message for the school:
"Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your
school. In order
to assist you in connecting the right staff member, please listen to
all your options before making a selection:

"To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1

"To make excuses for why your child did not do his work- Press 2

"To complain about what we do - Press 3

"To swear at staff members - Press 4

"To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in
your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you - Press 5

"If you want us to raise your child - Press 6

"If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone - Press 7

"To request another teacher for the third time this year- Press 8

"To complain about bus transportation - Press 9

"To complain about school lunches - Press 0

"If you realize this is the real world and your child must be
accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior, class work,
homework, and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child's lack of
effort: Hang up and have a nice day!"

Nov 7, 2004

Why?

Why do bad things always happen to good people?

One of my best friends in the whole world just had her heart stepped on, and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it. She is, without a doubt, the nicest person I know, and the nicest person I have ever known. The guy who she loves doesn't know how lucky he is, and he's just being stupid about it, too. I mean, if there is such a thing as two people being made for each other, they're it. And it's just horrible to see my friend say that she wants to crawl into a hole forever and die, and meanwhile this guy...I don't know.

Why can't he see how much she loves him?

I'm relatively happy right now, but I almost feel like it came at the expense of everyone else's happiness. I know that's ridiculous, but it seems like all of my friends' lives have gone down the drain while mine's finally getting better. And I know that everyone has good days and bad days, but why can't we all have our good days on the same day?

Why not have our good weeks together, or months, or years?

How does it work that while the shallowest and stupidest people at my school move in and out of relationships (if they can even be called that), one of my other friends, an awesome person who wants and deserves someone great, keeps on getting burned? She's happy for a while, and then something has to happen, and it's not her fault at all; her heart just happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Why does she always get hurt?

Maybe it's not that they're "good" people; maybe it's just that they expect some sort of decency and fairness out of life. Maybe that's too much to ask. Is it? Should we always expect the worse, so we don't get our hopes dashed and our dreams shattered? Is cynicism the way to go? I read somewhere that if you set your sights low, then all you get is pleasantly surprised. But in this case, it seems like you can't put your expectations low enough for them to be under what's going to happen.

Why do bad things always happen to good people?

Oct 24, 2004

Oops.

My dating post back in February.

OK FINE. I WAS WRONG. SO SUE ME.

If anyone had actually bothered to both read that post AND watch me recently, you're probably wondering exactly how much more hypocritical I can get. Because I doubt anyone is stalking me THAT much, here's the deal: read that post, then imagine anything and everything that I can do to completely go against it. And I'm talking a line-by-line rebuttal here, people.
I'm posting this now because I was reading that old post on dating, and I realized how much I've contradicted myself. And so I think that it's about time I redefine my views a bit. I mean, I only feel hypocritical if I denounce something as wrong, KNOW that it's wrong, and do it anyways. I don't feel that certain things are wrong anymore, and it's time I reorganize my thoughts on them.

Well, I guess it's not a TOTAL contradiction. I mean, some of the stuff I said in the first few paragraphs are still valid, I think. Seriously...the power issue really does happen. I know it's not happening to me right now, though, because I learned my lesson from that incident that I semi-described in that post. But really: a freshman and a senior? I feel like the maturity level difference on those is a bit too big. And it's not just the three-year age difference; the senior's gone through high school, mostly. He's seen things, done things...while the freshman's just gotten there. She's relatively naive, you know?


You think you’re in love, everyone else’s doing it, and the biggest and stupidest reason of all, it’s a status symbol.

I still agree with the last two reasons. Just because most people have a boyfriend/girlfriend is no reason to try and get one too. If you feel left out, that's not your fault; it's your friends. If they don't have the common decency to keep themselves off each other while they're with you, or while you're around, then they should change, not you.
And then the status symbol thing is even more inane now than ever, if that's even possible. People still date for the "prestige" and the "status" and that's just incredibly stupid, not to mention cheapening the concept of love for everyone else.
But that first one: "You think you're in love"...I'm not so sure about that anymore. Could it be possible at the age we're at? At one point I would've said "No." easily. But now...I don't know.
Because if what I'm in now isn't love, then what is it? I mentioned infatuation in my post, but this bond is far too deep, and exists on far too many levels for it to be a crush, or "puppy love".
But we'll get to that in a second. I do agree that the fact that people celebrate their one MONTH anniversaries, it's symbolic of how shallow the whole high school dating scene has become.
SO...on to the next paragraph.
The worst is when you start dating a close friend.

Yeah..."oops." Not dating, per se, but it WAS (and is) a close friend. What's really weird about redefining my views is that I read what I wrote before, and it all makes sense! And yet here I am. And for those of you wondering where "here" is, I'll get to that in just a moment.
So, about dating, or at least being in the infamous "relationship" with a close friend. It's true that most high school relationships don't work out, and it's also true that college destroys the ones that make it past the teenage years.
But is that any reason to be so pessimistic that you don't even TRY something? If I wasn't where I am now (and again, clarification is coming!), I'd wonder forever what it would have been like. Now I do, and regardless of what happens, regardless of what happens, be it next week, next year, or never, I'll never regret taking the chance and living the risk.
So sure, it may not work out, but you can have the time of your life while it lasts, and if you're careful, it doesn't have to end horribly. Dating (or whatever) a close friend shouldn't mean that when the "relationship" ends, your friendship does too. And if you can't manage that, then were you really close friends to begin with?
Now take note, I'm not trying to bash people whose relationship with a friend didn't work out, and it killed their friendship as well. That happens sometimes too, and sometimes you can't change it. I'm just saying that maybe it doesn't have to be that way, or at least, maybe it doesn't DEFINITELY have to be that way. Just have a little bit of hope, I guess.
Now, on to where "here" is, for me. To do this, I'm going to take one of those quizzes that someone made up:
Do you like/love someone right now?
Well, I'd hope that after this long post saying that my PREVIOUS post condemning high school dating was slightly wrong, it'd be pretty obvious. But for those peanut-for-brains out there, yes. I do. But don't ask me to specify like or love, because I don't think I'm mature enough to know the difference. From my personal experience, I'd say it's love, but my personal experience is only 16-ish years. That's not very much to explain the emotion that is the only reason that our entire species is still around.
Does she like/love you right now?
Well, you could take the previous answer and just switch the genders and point-of-view...or I could say this: it would seem so, and I hope to God that she does, but again, how am I to know? Only one person knows for sure, and as far as I am inside her head, I can't know the answer to this for certain.
How did it happen?
How? Interesting question. Let's just say that when you don't set boundaries to friendship, it kind of spills over. Not that that's a BAD thing.
What's happening now?
We're not dating, that's for sure. And I'd say we're "friends...with benefits", but that carries a horrible connotation with it. So let's leave it at this: we love/like/whatever each other, and we're content with that for now.
Where do I see myself with her in the future?
I don't know. I don't want to know. Someone asked me this before, and I told them that I have no earthly idea. Given all that stuff I said before about how relationships often don't work out, I don't really want to look very far ahead in the future. Sure, "playing it by ear" doesn't always work, but you can't plan ahead if you've got nothing to plan for. And plus, the spontanaeity is great.

So let's sum up now. Oh wait, I'm too lazy, and it's getting late. This has probably been a pretty disjointed post, and I don't think I got to half of the things I wanted to say, but that might be because I don't know what I wanted to say in the first place. So yeah...if you REALLY want more details, talk to me personally. Odds are, I won't give you any, but you know, if there's one thing I've learned from all this, it's that not even trying because you're afraid you'll fail is the biggest failure of all.

Oct 8, 2004

Showdown

Did anyone else notice President Bush walking in with his arms held a bit out to his sides, and a bit of a swagger in his walk? This isn't a showdown at high noon, Mr. President, it's a debate. Oh well, I guess everyone has his own style, right? But please, Mr. President, be nice to the moderator. Don't talk over the poor guy; he's just trying to do his job.
Kerry played this well by including Charlie Gibson in one of his jokes; nice job. He also made an excellent point on abortion by linking it to the separation of church and state. Kerry pointed out that although he, personally, was Catholic, he couldn't base national decisions on his own religion. Bush seemed to say this, but then he contradicted himself (on the embryonic stem cell research question).
For both candidates, you could see the influence of their debate coaches and political advisors seeping through. On Kerry's part, he made a very strong effort to be more conversational and speak less in "Senate-ese". But it just sounds kind of weird when says "It's gut-check time!" He sounded like some sort of superhero version of Jimeny Cricket.
And then Bush was desperate to keep a straight face during Kerry's speeches. You could tell he was trying not to smirk, but he ended up just looking like he had eaten some bad Mexican food for lunch.
Some other interesting points:
1. Bush claimed, if I'm not mistaken, that he proposed the hydrogen-generated automobile. First of all, it's hydrogen-POWERED. The way he said it, it means that you actually built the car from hydrogen. And does anyone else get this feeling of deja vu back to where Al Gore said he invented the Internet?
2. Speaking of the Internet, I thought there was only one. Did I hear Bush mention rumors on the "internets"? Plural? As in, a few of them? What other internet is there? Maybe this other internet is where Bush got the statistic that 75% of al-Quaeda members are captured? According to CNN.com, that's 75% of only TWO-DOZEN leaders that were identified at the time of 9/11. This says nothing of the countless terrorists that are just as willing as the leaders to kill and hurt us, AND it doesn't count anyone who has been recruited by them in the last three years.
3. Bush said something about forests being "harvested". Um, what?
4. In what I think was Bush's last speech, he claimed that if John Kerry was president, Saddam Hussein would still be in power, and the world would be a much better place. Wow. Just...wow.
5. The point of that question about Bush's mistakes was for him to identify three, and then talk about how he fixed them. He did neither. In fact, he seemed exceptionally arrogant when he essentially stated that he doesn't know of any mistakes he's made so for, and that we'll see in the "history books". Sure thing, Mr. President.

Basically, this second debate was much more lively, animated, and sharper than the first. The questions on domestic policy got a bit more specific, even though the foreign questions didn't really go anywhere that wasn't covered in the first debate. Kerry's statement of a "global test" came back to haunt him tonight, just as it kicked John Edwards in the head in the vice-presidential debate the other day. All in all, however, I don't really think that any one candidate won, but I'm sure that many of the statements made here will affect the final debate, which is on domestic policy.

P.S. I'd like to see how it turns out with a CBS person moderating that one.

Sep 30, 2004

"Well, What About Poland?"

What ABOUT Poland? It's POLAND, for Pete's sake!

But before I get to that, here's the slip-ups that Kerry made (that i noticed, anyways):

1. He said something about cornering bin Laden, then letting other countries try and capture him. A few minutes earlier, he had just criticized Bush for not letting other countries in on Iraq. Of course, this could have been easily clarified by Kerry in that bin Laden was OUR original target, therefore WE should capture him, just to be sure, but Bush never brought it up anyways, so yeah.

2. At one point, Kerry said that exercising the right to pre-emptive war should pass the "global test". Bush pointed this out, but didn't impact it enough. He could've talked more about how the safety of the American people must be valued above this global test, but he left it at one sentence.

And the great moments:

1. Bush pausing for what seemed to be several weeks as he tried to remember what he had just petitioned to be allowed to say.

2. Kerry saying that Bush "outsourced" the job of capturing bin Laden to Afghan warlords. Way to work in a domestic topic, Senator.

In the big picture, I'd say that Kerry did pretty well in this first debate. Foreign issues were supposed to be Bush's strong point, but Kerry showed decisively that he could have done much better in Iraq, and how Bush's policy on nuclear ("nukular") weapons contradicted itself (i.e. Iraq and North Korea).
Bush repeatedly mentioned inconsistency on Kerry's part, but he really didn't link it to questions, arguments, or topics well enough to make it relevant.
Kerry managed to take all of these attacks on his conviction and clearly state how in fact, Bush was the one sending mixed messages, not himself.
There were also some really stupid arguments made near the beginning of the debate, but they filtered out after a few questions.
End result: Kerry is really the better debater, and if this topic was supposed to be Bush's forte, I don't know if the domestic debate is going to even be television-appropriate.

And Poland, Mr. President, does not constitute a coalition.

Sep 24, 2004

What Is a Team?

The rest of this post is copied from ha's blog, and I can't agree more.

Last year, a group of unbelievably dedicated seniors took on the responsibility of managing and running an entire speech and debate team. They did a friggin' awesome job, and kept us together, didnt they? We learned, we conquered, we stayed together, we worked together, and we did it all with love.

But of course, those seniors graduated last year, and the whole team went into the hands of someone new (which was cool!).

Suddenly, it seemed as if everyone on the team had forgotten what they were in the first palce; a TEAM. People began doing exactly what the past seniors had constantly kept at bay, and prevented. Selfish goals were at hand now, people were backstabbing eachother, and nothing in the phrase "for the sake of team" seemed to ring a bell. We've all forgotten...and now, in a mere 6 weeks, we've managed to take down the very foundation of what yesterday's great leaders had tried to leave us.

Just a few weeks ago, a few enthusiastic debaters (myself included) had an argument with a few people over the definition of a team. It all boiled down to how a certain other club WASNT a true team, and how speech n debate functions better because we are. The message sent over and over was "a team is not just a group of individuals." The reason why the debate team was so strong last year was because we worked together like a family. And so we preached on about that for about another hour...

But then, just two weeks later, I find myself thinking, "We're turning ourselves INTO a group of individuals." And this...is not a team. What have we done to ourselves, guys?

Out of sheer frustration in an attempt to revive the soul of something lost, I've decided to post the following:

WHAT IS A TEAM?
A team is a group of individuals with a common goal never forgotten.
A team works together.
Team members will always listen to one another.
Team members always try to cheer up other team members when they're sad.
A team member will not let another team member fall, because...
The team falls to the level of its lowest member.
No one is neglected on a team.
Everyone shares equal responsibility on a team.
"We are an army of one."
A team member always shows respect for another team member.
"There is no 'I' in team."
A team will always support those in it.
Team members don't talk BAD about other team members.
Team members do NOT take advantage of other team members.
"UNITED WE STAND, DIVIDED WE FALL."
You are always part of this team.
The actions of one affect all on a team.
THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS HATE ON A TEAM.
A team is always there for you.
Personal problems have no place on a team.
Selfishness has no place on a team.
A team believes in what it strives for.
A team leaves NO ONE behind.
A team understands what a team is.

Please try to remember, you guys. We've all grown to love this team. At least, I have. And I could never forgive myself knowing that I was a part of this team, and I was a part of allowing it to fall...

Sep 19, 2004

The Godfather

I need a bumper sticker (for my nonexistant car) that says:

How's My Conducting?
Call 281-555-8697

Maria just told me that the love theme from the Godfather has lyrics:


LOVE THEME FROM 'THE GODFATHER' (Speak Softly Love)
(N. Rota - L. Kusik • Famous Music Corporation/ASCAP 2:59)

Speak softly love
And hold me warm against your heart
I feel your words
The tender trembling moments start

We're in our world
Our very own
Sharing a love that only
Few have ever known

Wine colored days, warmed by the sun
Deep velvet nights, when we are one

Speak softly love
So no one hears us but the sky
The vows of love we make
Will live until we die

My life is yours
And all because
You came into my world with
Love so softly love

[Musical interlude]

Speak softly love
So no one hears us but the sky
The vows of love we make
Will live until we die

My life is yours
And all because
You came into my world with
Love so softly love


That's so awesome.

Sep 16, 2004

Bittersweet

Bittersweet. The juxtaposition of two opposites. An oxymoron, some might say, but I think I know what whoever coined that word was talking about.

It's intense longing with extreme pleasure.
It's doing something great but having to stop right before you get there.
It's being able to see something but not have it.
It's having an emotional connection but being barred from having anything more.
It's sitting right next to someone but not being able to hold their hand.
It's enjoying the moment, knowing that it'll be over far too soon.
It's fighting off tears of joy and sadness at the same time.

It's not knowing if you'd do it all over again if you had the choice.

Sep 3, 2004

Wow.

So I haven't posted on here in a LONG time. You know, I feel like a lot of blogs are going uncared for recently...I wonder if that's a phase or a permanent phasing out of blogs? I hope it's the former...blogs are an excellent way for us to feel even MORE wired to each other.
My TestMasters class is full of mutes. Seriously. They just don't talk.
Oh, and I was watching The Godfather (part I) today. It's an excellent movie; everyone should see it.
Get some sleep, people. The school year is just getting started.

Aug 19, 2004

Not Worth It

It's not worth it. Nothing is.
For the past few nights, I've stayed up until at least one A.M. to write cases and prep for the debate tournament. I've gotten an average of five hours of sleep, and while that seems like a lot to some people, it's not. Not for me, at least.
So I'm never doing this again. Don't get me wrong; I'm not quitting debate. But if I'm ever as unprepared as this, I have to remember my priorities. My health comes first, which means a decent amount of sleep. Right now, sleep is a dream, ironically enough. I have a few quizzes to study for, and then finally I want to finish my neg case. Even though it's just the first week of school, my grades have suffered (or are about to suffer) because of my paying way too much attention to debate. There's something wrong when you completely forget to make up a test after school.
Right now, I'm feeling frustrated, sleepy, annoyed, and just plain exhausted. I know that I get quite mean when I'm like this, and I'm so sorry to anyone who IMed me and got snapped at. I didn't mean it, or at least didn't mean to mean it.
So now, as I decide to skip studying for a test tomorrow, I finally feel like I've made the right choice.
Everything else can wait; I need my rest.

Aug 16, 2004

On the Sharp Side

I suppose it's time I officially announce my just-started web comic, On the Sharp Side. It's a comic strip that's being hosted online using Blogger and PhotoBucket, so go check it out. I only have three strips up, but I'm writing more. Oh, and tell your friends. Well, at least your musician friends. I'm not sure if other normal people would get it.
Oh, and wish me luck at Austin H.S. My first TFA and my third tournament overall. At least I'm going novice, but I'm still going to get my butt handed to me.
Peace!

Aug 9, 2004

*Shudder*

I reformatted my hard drive today, and therefore I have to copy all my backups back to my newly cleansed computer. It's taking quite a while, so I just decided to get it done tonight and stay up late.
That's when I saw him. "He" was some sort of insect. He was about as long as the diameter of a quarter and had six legs, extremely long feelers, and some sort of strange, rotating tail. He was on the wall behind my computer.
Now, that's not the weirdest bug I've seen. When I was in India last summer with my family, I glimpsed a large colorful insect on a flight of stairs. It was doing the strangest thing, too. It would fling itself against one wall of the stairwell with all its might, then flop to the ground, where after a couple seconds of recovery, it would once again fly madly at the other wall. This went on for quite some time. Eventually we just hopped over the step.
But back to this one. I tolerated he while talking on the phone to a friend; he just crawled around and occasionally flew a few feet along the wall. It seemed like he was exercising. Eventually he expanded his workout to include another wall, and an periodic foray across the room.
I couldn't stand it anymore. I considered sleeping out in the hall and even dragged my bedsheets and pillows outside, but then I decided, this is MY room so HE'D better get out.
I crept back inside my room, fearing that he might not be in the same place as when I'd left. He wasn't, but after a few seconds of frantic searching during which chills ran up my spine with increasing frequency, I located the bug doing a cool-down routine on the windowshade.
Keeping my eye on him, I sat down on my couch. I needed a plan, but the only one I could think of was to scare him off the window and swat him out of the air. It'd make a big mess to splat him all over the window. That plan would have to do.
I snuck across the room and grabbed the largest book on the bookshelf. Then I edged over to the window. A sudden move should do it. I swung the book near him, and he fled the window, only to run straight into my second swing.
For a second I thought he had splattered himself across the book, then I saw him in the corner. He was flipping over himself repeatedly. I knew I must have injured him, but I wasn't sure, so I sat down to watch him. After a while he became motionless. Dead. Finally. I went back outside to get my sheets and pillows.
When I got back in he had crawled halfway up the wall.
"No," I whispered. "You're dead." In disbelief I watched as he crawled in a circle a few times, as if to show off.
Maybe I had just hit his wing or something. At least he couldn't fly anymore. But what to do now?
My eyes lighted on the laminated periodic table of the elements lying in another corner of my room. I knew it was good for something.
I used it to flick the bug off the wall. He caught himself in midair and took off flying around the room. Apparently I hadn't damaged him at all.
He finally flew near the door, which I had thankfully left open. I waited until he had strayed out the door, then kicked it shut.
Whew.
Of course, there's always that crack underneath the door...

Aug 2, 2004

News and Links

Here are a few items of interest:

1. The All-State excerpts have been posted at the TMEA website. They also updated the errata for the etudes that were posted earlier this summer.

2. An excellent online comic caught my attention that you guys should check out. It's called Real Life Comics, by Greg Dean.

3. Tomorrow (Tuesday) is decoration day for the orchestra at Hightower. If you're in orchestra and you want to come, be there at 5:00 or thereabouts. I think we're supposed to bring crafts materials too, like markers and such. Check with Sarah if you really want to be sure. Oh yeah, and tag the board or comment if you're coming so we know who to expect.

4. Doom 3 is coming out soon. You'll be able to tell by the day that everyone calls in sick from work.

5. There's an excellent program that I've started using called Stickies. They're like the Post-It's for the computer, except better. Go here to download it. Actually, there's another program called Stickies too. I'm not sure which one is better, so try that one out too.

That's all for today. Enjoy the rest of your summer!

Jul 26, 2004

Send Me!

The Democratic National Convention just got off to a rousing start. In case you missed it, here's the general jist of Bill Clinton's speech.

I come to you today to talk about John Kerry. He will be great because he has the same name as other great presidents such as John Adams and John Kennedy. And so does his vice president, John Edwards.
The Republicans had many views on running this country over the past four years, such as...[descends into technical mumbling]...and in consequence, making little old ladies carry their own groceries! If you want this, go ahead, by all means vote for them. But if not, JOHN KERRY AND JOHN EDWARDS ARE HERE!!!
George W. Bush also did things like tax cuts the rich...[complicated mumbling again]...which in turn, closed down all schools and made every child join a gang simply to eat every day! If this is your idea of America, vote for him. But if you don't think that's right, JOHN KERRY'S YOUR MAN!!!
If you want to vote for the party that I'm pretty sure had something to do with the West Nile virus, go ahead, but if not, VOTE FOR JOHN KERRY AND THE DEMOCRATS!!!
When the Vietnam War arrived, I ducked military duty along with Bush. But when they asked John Kerry, he said, "Send me!".
When the Army asked John Kerry to go in for dangerous missions, he didn't hide. He said, "Send me!".
And then later, when volunteers were needed to infiltrate an evil scientist's lab on a remote island, John Kerry said, "Send me!".
When America was threatened by a huge asteriod, did John Kerry run? No! He donned his red and blue tights and flew into outer space to stop it with his bare hands, shouting, "Send me!".
And remember, his name's John.

That's the basic idea. Good night, everybody.

Jul 23, 2004

Here We Go Again

I'm sorry, but Amanda made me do it!
and yes, i know you're SUPPOSED to put it in a comment on that person's xanga, but i don't have a xanga, so i can't comment and crap. shut up.
and yes, if i must, i'll do this quiz for other people too. just ask. nicely.

YET ANOTHER QUIZ
1. who are you?
rook, who else?
2. are we friends?
yeah
3. when and how did we meet?
german, i think?
4. how have i affected you?
you made me friends with the german I's
5. what do u think of me?
"well, lemme es'plain...no, too long. lemme sum up." still too long...isn't that what this entire quiz is for?
6. what's the fondest memory you have of me?
doing "3-headed broadway star" at lunch with nick
7. how long do you think we will be friends?
as long as you want to be friends, i'm game
8. do you love me?
define "love"
9. do you have a crush on me?
no
10. would you kiss me?
probably not
11. would you hug me?
sure
12. physically, what stands out?
eyes
13. emotionally, what stands out?
sense of humor
14. do you wish i was cooler?
you can't be any cooler!
15. on a scale of 1-10, how hot am i?
ein zu zehn? das ist sehr klein fur dich.
16. give me a nickname and explain why you picked it
schlampe...no, jk. a nickname? that's hard...
17. am i loveable?
mhm
18. how long have you known me?
less than a year
19. describe me in one word.
bright
20. what was your first impression?
an intelligent, funny girl with the proverbial twinkle in her eye
21. do you still think that way about me now?
yep
22. what do you think my weakness is?
that's assuming you HAVE one
23. do you think i'll get married?
yes
24. what makes me happy?
i've never seen you NOT happy
25. what makes me sad?
see above
26. what reminds you of me?
"whose line"
27. if you could give me anything what would it be?
ich weiss nicht
28. how well do you know me?
moderately well
29. when's the last time you saw me?
end of last school year
30. ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
um...not really
31. do you think i could kill someone?
if it was worth it, yes
32. are you going to put this on your xanga and see what i say about you?
NO XANGA! XANGA BAD! BLOG GOOD!

Jul 19, 2004

AFA 2004

AFA's over, sadly, but pictures are up here.
Also, Ashley Salinas created an AFA blogring here. Unfortunately, I can't join, but I'll put a permanent link to it whenever I get around to putting my links up.
See you guys next summer!

Jul 12, 2004

A Bit TOO Personal

Some things we just don't need to know:
click here (the second paragraph)

Jul 8, 2004

A Dream

Last night I had a dream. In it, someone I miss dearly came to my house, somehow, and we were just sitting and chatting. And that, just being there talking, was complete heaven. I haven't seen this person since school ended, just seen them on AIM, said "hi!" over the phone. But there's nothing like actually talking; nothing replaces face-to-face conversation.
Today has been the worst day of a horrible week. My shoulder's been hurting from viola playing, I have to learn a piece that I'm playing as a favor for the bride in a wedding in Albany, NY tomorrow; I've been overstressed, overworked, and yelled at all day. And all this with no frappuccino to get me through the day, too.
But every time I get way too depressed, I just calm down, take a deep breath, and remember that wonderful feeling I had, just talking. And then, when I'm playing my piece for that wedding, I only have to remember the feeling I had when I woke up and realized it was all a dream to push that extra emotion into the music.

Jul 2, 2004

"I'm Back."

...quoting the T-101 from the Terminator series.

So yes, I'm back, but it may not be for long, depending on how lazy/active I am. Some updates:
- I've taken up harmonica, which is going pretty well. The only problem is a lack of music to play.
- My summer music camp, the American Festival for the Arts (AFA), is also going great. We had an excellent first concert, and we're all set to have another one in two weeks, when we're playing Tschaikovsky's 2nd Symphony.
- I have 5 invitations to Gmail from my account. So if I know you (or probably even if I don't), leave me a message on the tagboard and I'll see if I want to give you one.
- For anyone who's out of town, or going to be out of town, have fun and use sunscreen! At least over here, the funked up Houston weather has kicked in, making it either pouring rain or hot and humid.
- I'm leaving for Albany, NY a week from today for a wedding, which should be fun.
And that's about it for now. Oh, and I think I'm going to finish my short story that I started a while ago. If I ever do finish, I'll post the three parts up here one by one for your reading pleasure.
Enjoy your summer break!

Jun 13, 2004

Summer Reruns

And here are my summer reruns because:
1. I'm too lazy to post.
2. AFA starts tomorrow and I won't have time.

So every time i've got nothing better to do I'll post a link to one of my old posts or one of someone else's old posts. Enjoy!

Rerun #1 - The Blogster Awards
Rerun #2 - Vibrrrrrrraaatoh!
Rerun #3 - To Rhyme
Rerun #4 - The First "10" List

Jun 11, 2004

An English to English Dictionary

The english language is so weird. to show you what i mean, let's look at a passage from Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, translated into English through the ages...

--------------------------------
SCENE I. Verona. A public place.

Enter SAMPSON and GREGORY, of the house of Capulet, armed with swords and bucklers
SAMPSON
Gregory, o' my word, we'll not carry coals.

GREGORY
No, for then we should be colliers.

SAMPSON
I mean, an we be in choler, we'll draw.

GREGORY
Ay, while you live, draw your neck out o' the collar.

SAMPSON
I strike quickly, being moved.

GREGORY
But thou art not quickly moved to strike.

SAMPSON
A dog of the house of Montague moves me.

GREGORY
To move is to stir; and to be valiant is to stand:
therefore, if thou art moved, thou runn'st away.
------------------------------------------
That was the original Shakespeare...now let's see the modern summary/translation, courtesy of SparkNotes...
------------------------------------------

Sampson and Gregory, two servants of the house of Capulet, stroll through the streets of Verona. With bawdy banter, Sampson vents his hatred of the house of Montague. The two exchange punning remarks about physically conquering Montague men and sexually conquering Montague women.

-----------------------------------------
and now translated to the way a AOL user would write it, via the AOLer Translator...
-----------------------------------------
SCENE I. Verona. A public place.

Enter SAMPSON and GREGORY, of the house of Capulet, armed with swords and bucklers
SAMPSON
GRAGORY O MAH WORD WAL NOT CARY COALS

GREGORY
NO FOR THEN WA SHUD B COLEIRS

SAMPSON
I MAAN AN WE B IN CHOLAR W3L DRAW

GREGORY
AY WHIEL U LIEV DRAW UR NEK OUT O DA COLAR

SAMPSON
I STRIEK QUIKLY BNG MOVED

GREGORY
BUT THOU ART NOT QUIKLY MOVED 2 STRIEK

SAMPSON
A DOG OF TEH HOUSA OF MONTAGU3 MOV3S ME

GREGORY
2 MOV3 IS 2 STIR AND 2 B VALIANT IS 2 THEIR IF THOU ART MOVAD THOU RUNST AWAY!!1! LOL
------------------------------------

Jun 6, 2004

20 (times 5) Questions

I didn't really want to do this, but here goes anyways...

HAVE YOU EVER...
1. Kissed your cousin: on the cheek, sure
2. Ran away: nope
3. Pictured your crush naked: not gonna answer this ~.~
4. Skipped school: me? no, seriously...
5. Broken someone's heart: sadly, yes
6. Been in love: depends on your definition of "love"
7. Cried when someone died: mhm, my uncle...R.I.P. Kshitij Kothari
8. Wanted someone you knew you could never have: yep
9. Broken a bone: nope
10. Done something embarressing: THIS is embarassing!
11. Lied: i prefer to call them "distortions of the truth"
12. Cried in school: nah

WHICH IS BETTER...
13. Coke or Pepsi: Coke, duh
14. Sprite or 7up: sprite, if anything
15. Girls or guys: in what way?
16. Flowers or candy: CHOCOLATE!!!
17. Scruff or clean shaved: wtf?
18. Blonds or brunettes: quoting Ha: "Neither. Black hair is friggin awesome."
19. B!tchy or Slutty: there's a difference?
20. Tall or short: for girls, i'll take short
21. Pants or shorts: Pants
22. Night or day: the shadows of the nocturne

WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX... (ooh this should be interesting)
23. What do you notice first: smile
24. Last person you slow-danced with: let's see...i think it was nupur...she taught me how to slow dance (thanks!)
25. Worst Question to Ask: what gender are you really?

THE LAST TIME YOU...
26. Showered: this morning
27. Stepped outside: my balcony, about five minutes ago

ABOUT YOU...
28. Romantic moment: nothing noteworthy
29. Romantic moment gone wrong: see above
30. Your Good Luck Charm: keychain
31. Person you hate the most: no one, really
32. Best thing that has ever happened to you: lieben
33. Worst thing that has ever happened: see above
34. Picture on your desk: me and my sister!

FAVORITE...
35. Color: blue
36. Movie: lord of the rings! woo hoo!
37. Artist or band: too many! some good ones: dispatch, Wise Guys, Howard Shore
38. Ice cream: double chocolate chunk dipped in chocolate
39. Food: indian, chinese, mexican, italian, american

WHO...
40. Makes u laugh the most: um...myself
41. Makes u smile: the innate humor in the world
42. Can Make you feel better no matter what: my sister
43. Has a crush on you: *cough*
44. Do you have a crush on: *cough*
45. Has it Easier: class of '07 in mr. trinh's class
46. Gives you a funny feeling when you see them? define "funny"
47. Makes you feel like you can fly forever: isn't this getting a bit personal???
48. Do you love unconditionally? family

DO YOU EVER...
49. Sit by the phone at night waiting for a certain someone to call: if they TELL me they're calling, then sure...otherwise, not really
50. Save AIM conversations: twice
51. Save e-mails: i have Gmail! i archive everything
52. Forward secret emails: never
53. Wish you were someone else: probably once or twice, but not really
54. Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: NO
55. Wear cologne: meh
56. Kiss: kiss who?
57. Cuddle: meh
58. Go online for more than 8hrs at a time: a real question would be LESS than 8 hours at a time

HAVE YOU EVER...
59. Fallen for your best friend: funny you should ask...
60. Made out with JUST a friend: no.
61. Kissed two people in the same day: mom and dad?
62. Had sex with two ppl in the same day: well...no, just kidding
63. Been rejected: not yet
64. Been in love: define "love"
65. Been in lust: no.
66. Used someone: i'd love to say no, but...
67. Been used: meh
68. Dumped someone: nope
69. Been Cheated on: not yet...let's keep it that way
70. Been Kissed: by?
71. Done Something you regret: yes.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...
72. You touched: my mom
73. You talked to: my mom
74. You hugged: my mom or my dad...there aren't that many ppl in my house! and i haven't been anywhere the whole day
75. You IMed: close2home
76. You kissed: dunno
77. You yelled at: dunno
78. You thought about: someone ~.~
79. Who text-messaged you: i think it was joy, about a year and a half ago...
80. Who broke your heart: *sigh*...
81. Who told you they loved you: no comment

DO YOU...
82. Have tattoos: define "tattoo"
83. Have piercings: nope
84. Have a boyfriend: um...that's disturbing. who made me take this quiz anyways??
85. Own a Webcam: yeah, but do i use it? no.
86. Own a Thong: nah
87. Ever get off that damn computer: never
88. Sprechen Sie Deutsch: Ja, Deutsch ist am Besten!
89. Habla espanol: nein
90. Quack: do i quack? yeah, at the ducks on the lake near my house.
91. Do a lot of stupid stuff: sometimes

HAVE YOU/ DO YOU/ ARE YOU...
92. Stolen anything: let's just keep that quiet, okay?
93. Smoke: although i don't have MY brain, i do have A brain. NO.
94. Schizophrenic: at times i argue with myself...does that count?
95. Obsessive: um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um
96. Compulsive: ;slkjlkjfkd
97. Obsessive Compulsive: *twitches convulsively* heh heh heh
98. Panic: when panic is called for, yes
99. Anxiety: "have you anxiety?" "do you anxiety?" "are you anxiety?" none of those work, you 100-questions-writing-idiot!
100. Depressed: sometimes...but overall no.

whew...finally done. and i managed to not reveal anything at all! yay!

60 Years From D-Day

Go here for my D-Day project.
It's been 60 years...I quote The Return of the King:

"Hail the victorious dead."

Jun 3, 2004

meh...

Current time...11:58 PM

my aim conversations are slowly ending as one by one, people either go to sleep or get annoyed with me. mostly they go like this:

hOtangel: why dont u go 2 sleep?
nirav015: i'm too lazy to drag myself the two feet to my bed
hOtangel: thats just insane
nirav015: well
nirav015: i also have to turn off the light
hOtangel: you're just a lazy beep
nirav015: sounds about right

(note: hOtangel is nupur, not some random online hooker, as it may seem by the name)
here's another funny excerpt:

hOtangel: todays the first day i was home the whole day
hOtangel: all i did was SLEEP
nirav015: i've been home for the past week...consider yourself lucky
hOtangel: ive been out VOLUNTEERING
hOtangel: i consider that fun, eh?
nirav015: right
hOtangel: volunteering my foot
nirav015: i didn't know anyone would want your foot

...right. here's what else i've been doing: reading archives from Real Life Comics (it's an online comic strip, idiot). i think colin suggested it to me.
i was thinking about drawing a comic strip myself, but i realized that i can't draw worth a crap. my comic self portrait looks like a lima bean. and i'm not joking.
so if you, dear reader, have anything at all to do, please leave a comment or tag the message board because I (to use a cliche) am bored beyond belief. if you're bored just like me, IM me and we'll have a pointless conversation.

P.S. it's the next day. i'm having a pointless conversation with maerilly...excerpts:

nirav015: you know what?
ooooolala06: chicken butt?
nirav015: no

...and...

ooooolala06: FIND A BLOG SKIN!
nirav015: I WILL
nirav015: SOMEDAY
nirav015: whenever i get off my lazy beep and get around to it
ooooolala06: then get off it now!
ooooolala06: hehe
nirav015: it happens to be quite comfortable where it is, thank you very much

"Oh, The Places You'll Go..."

I told Ha the other day that "I don't travel much...only a few places." But then she asked where I've been, and I realized that actually, I travel a LOT.
Here's my list so far:

Foreign Cities
London, England
Budapest, Hungary
Vienna, Austria
Bombay, India
Delhi, "
Prague, the Czech Republic
Bratislava, Slovakia
Venice, Italy
Florence, "
Rome, "
Zurich, Switzerland
Basel, "
Toronto, Canada
Amsterdam, Holland

U.S. Cities
Los Angeles, California
San Francisco, "
Palo Alto (Stanford), "
Santa Cruz, "
Washington D.C.
Austin, Texas
San Antonio, "
El Paso, "
Port Aransas, "
Dallas, "
Galveston, "
Corpus Christi, "
Orlando, Florida
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Columbia, Missouri
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Detroit, "

That's all for now. I'm going to Albany, New York later this summer for a wedding. One more to add to the list!

Jun 2, 2004

Abandoned

What's going on?? I feel like all my friends have left me. Everyone's either:

1. On a cruise (Joy)
2. In Germany (Jordan, Andrew, most people in German)
3. In Iowa (Pranay)
4. Under house arrest (Ha)
5. Just logged off AIM (Maerilly)
6. Not on AIM at all (everyone else)

It's boring! Especially since I actually have work to do; I'm taking the Chemistry SAT II on Saturday, and I'm supposed to be studying.
I've taken to playing Tien Len, also known as VC, with Maria and Luis. That, or I've been playing iSketch.
Also, I've been checking my Gmail inbox. Repeatedly. As though I expect someone to email me. Even though I haven't emailed anyone.
You can see how much my life has degenerated. I need b&n, coffee, and spades.

May 31, 2004

Memorial Day 2004

Remember the fallen...

May 30, 2004

A Short Play

I think I'll write a play...

----------
So...What Now?
-----
By Nirav Sanghani
-----
Cast:
Ralph
Sally

-----
[Ralph and Sally are sitting at a table in a coffee-shop]

Ralph: So that's it then. We're done. It's over.

Sally: Yeah, I guess so.

R: [sighs]

S: [sighs]

R: Pity, too. We would have been so-

S: -great together, I know. But it was-

R: -my decision, yeah. Actually, I thought it was up to both of us.

S: Hey, I told you my end. It's only up to you now.

R: Sure thing.

S: Did I detect sarcasm in that statement?

R: Perhaps...

S: [sighs]

R: What?

S: Nothing.

R: You always say that.

S: Say what?

R: "Nothing."

S: No, tell me!

R: I just did! You always say "nothing."

S: Oh.

R: Right.

S: So...what now?

R: Hey, I've got an idea!

S: That's a first.

R: I suppose I deserved that.

S: Yes you did.

R: We should just get married and skip all the dating crap.

S: Now, how does that work?

R: Never mind.

S: Okay. If you say so. [begins to hum tunelessly]

R: Hey, kid...what's that tune you always hum?

S: I wasn't aware I was humming the same tune. [begins to hum again, listens to herself] Wow! You're right.

R: So what is it then?

S: I don't know.

R: Oh.

S: Yeah.

R: So...what now?

S: I honestly have no idea.

R: As usual.

S: Wait...was that an insult?

R: Probably.

S: Oh, okay. Just checking.

R: Right.

S: I think you're over-analyzing this.

R: Am I?

S: Yes, yes you are.

R: Am I really?

S: Um...yes?

R: Oh, okay. Just checking.

S: Okay. So anyways, you need to look at the big picture.

R: What big picture?

S: You know, step back and look at everything as a whole. I mean, inspecting the nooks and crannies is good, but sometimes you just have to look at the whole thing, plain and simple.

R: But what if it's not simple?

S: It is, trust me.

R: You know, things aren't as clear for me as they are for you.

S: Just think about it for a while.

R: But I don't want to think! Wait...that sounded just like you!

S: And right now, I'm the one giving the advice...

R: ...meaning you stole my mind!

S: And enjoying it very much, thank you.

R: Just don't get it dirty or anything...

S: I'll take good care of it, don't worry.

R: ...though of course, I suppose the inside of your skull is exceptionally clean, not having had to hold anything before.

S: I'm sorry, what was that?

R: Nothing...

S: Was that another insult?

R: [smiles]

S: Grr.

R: [sighs]

S: This is getting pointless.

R: All of our conversations have been pointless, since...you know.

S: Yeah.

R: This is the hugest subject avoidance I've ever seen.

S: [nods]

R: So...

S: So...

R & S: ...what now?

----------

Thank you very much, I hope you enjoyed my short play. I know I enjoyed writing it. :-)

May 28, 2004

3. All of the above.

Gotta love those Freudian slips!

Life really is like a sitcom. I think mine's this bad UPN one that you think is the corniest show ever, but you still watch it just because you've got nothing better to do. My second season just ended...it got higher ratings than last year, but the season finale left something to be desired. I guess we're just going to have to wait for the premiere this August.

And it really is all in the timing.

May 27, 2004

Halfway Done

The title says it all. We're halfway done with high school. Yeesh.

So here's the rundown on exams week (starting Saturday, because that's when I started studying):

Saturday:
I met Luis, Maria, Joy, Brandon (Cogan), and Alicia at Barnes and Noble to study World History and Chemistry. The main thing that happened was that Luis got me all the correct answers to the old chem tests (which didn't help much anyways; see Thursday)...then Cogan and Joy left...Alicia showed up for around five-sixths of a second and left again...and so Luis, Maria, and I are left hanging around Starbucks. We played cards for a while; I learned poker (yay!) and, after not being able to get Pranay or Ha to come there to play Spades, Luis asked a random stranger if he knew how to play Spades...which I didn't want to teach, so we ended up playing V.C....the random person was Asian, so he won, of course. I had a Java Chip Frapuccino, which was excellent.
Then we gave up cards, and Luis quizzed Maria and me on World History...half the answers seemed to be "unrestricted submarine warfare"...don't ask.
Maria had to go, leaving Luis and I supremely bored at b&n. and hungry, we were pretty hungry too. (oh yeah, and maerilly was SUPPOSED to come, but she skipped out on us)
So we decided to walk over to the buildings in the parking lot of b&n, but there was no place there that we could afford. we ended up walking to First Colony Mall and eating in the food court, where I saw Amanda Comer.
Then Luis realized he was supposed to meet his ride at AMC First Colony about fifteen minutes ago and had to run, so I just waited for my parents to pick me up...after that I went to CiCi's with my family (yes, the stammtisch CiCi's). Went to sleep pretty soon after we came back.

Sunday:
I was SUPPOSED to be studying this day, but I had decided the day before that I couldn't study at home; it's SO MUCH EASIER to study at b&n. So again, I got a ride there from my dad. Also, I realized the secret to studying at a bookstore: you have to know what you're going to get distracted by...in my case (at b&n) it's ALWAYS that I end up picking up some random book and read instead of studying. So, in order to keep myself on track, I called Ha and got her to come keep me company. I was studying precal that day, and my plan worked tremendously well (see Monday).
We found a book that she'd known about called All in the Timing (title of my blog now), which has 14 one-act plays by a guy called David Ives. REALLY hilarious. we want to do 'variations on the death of trotsky' for reader's theater next year.
I had ANOTHER java chip frapuccino (thanks to Ha), which probably wasn't exceptionally good for me. She had coffee too, but I guess it didn't work too well, because after about an hour or so she nearly fell asleep. Anyways, so I did in fact get some work done.
Her dad got there, so she left. In about five minutes I had found a book on game design and was reading that for the next twenty minutes until my mom called and said she was almost there to come get me.
Also, I found a cd in the music section by Dispatch which I MUST buy soon. I just need money.

Monday:
Took PreCal and German. I thought this would be my hardest day, but in fact that ended up being Friday, ironically enough. PreCal was grueling, but not exceptionally hard. German was actually pretty hard. Got home, went to sleep, woke up, ate, went back to sleep.

Tuesday:
Multimedia and Compsci. Easy stuff. After compsci the girls were playing this game that resulted in a prediction of neil grabbing shalin's butt. Gross stuff. After multimedia I did an audioblogger post of blake spreading...he didn't spread his fastest, but oh well. After school I did pretty much the same thing as the day before: got home, went to sleep, woke up, ate, went back to sleep.

Wednesday:
English and World History. Both were moderately easy. The World History final was exactly like the review, thank God.

Thursday:
That's today, savvy? During Orchestra, we played Spades. The result? Mr. Soto and I thoroughly kicked Asif's and Naveed's collective butt. Of course, Asif blames it all on Naveed. I really should have studied for chem instead, because the next period, I got completely owned by the Chemistry final. 200 questions in about 1.5 hours. Pure hell. I should be okay...I can miss 56 questions and still make an A for the semester. Also, I ran out of time, so I called The Random Crap Rule, which states: If you write down Completely Random Crap on a test, you're bound to get at least ONE answer correct. I very much hope so.
Oh yeah, and I found out my PreCal grade: 98. NINETY-EIGHT! If it wasn't the last day of school, I'd get jumped by juniors; I completely wrecked the grade curve. mwahaha. So I guess studying at b&n worked after all.

Peace out, friends. Enjoy your summer, and DON'T BE SMART UNTIL AUGUST!

May 23, 2004

Gmail and B&N

So as some (or perhaps none) of you might know, I got into the GMail (google mail) beta test. Apparently people will go to great lengths to get a gmail account (which i got through blogger, but only some people can get that).
on gmail swap, a site dedicated to letting invitations to gmail be traded, people offer the strangest things. i've seen a human liver, a left index finger nail, an unused cd key for counter-strike, domesticated animals, and my personal favorite, "the last lingering shreds of my dignity" (scroll down if you clicked on the last one)
also, gmail accounts have been sold for over $150 on ebay. wow. i should've done that.

oddly, finals haven't really hit me yet. i'm off to b&n to study, but they still seem really far off...
mochacappafrappuccino!

...

just came back from b&n and a java chip frappuccino (thanks again!)
i'm not sure what just happened...a close friend told me that she did some soul-searching and is mostly at peace with herself; i think my inner balance just got thrown off...

P.S. ...yes, there is a dispatch cd there; it has two cds: around 20 songs from live performances...that's where i went when your (you know who you are) dad came...

ALSO!!! the new title of my blog comes from the title of a collection of short plays by David Ives. he's a brilliant one-act playwright...he wrote "variations on the death of trotsky" (which is my new subheading and also "sure thing", among others...really hilarious

May 18, 2004

Pratham Gala 2004!

So here i am, finally blogging about the gala.
Pratham: volunteer movement to help raise literacy among children in India (and doing a pretty good job of it too). every year they hold this huge gala (700 ppl) to raise money: tickets are $100 each, but it's more of a donation thing. for that you get a cocktail hour, followed by fancy dinner with hindi music, then dancing and crap.
[note: i just realized that my entire involvement in pratham stemmed directly out of mrs. lafleur's volunteer project; must thank her for that]
anyways, so i got to the Westin Galleria ballroom at around 2:00, shortly thereafter Manasy, the head of volunteers, arrived. we hung around for a while; she told me that she told ppl to be there at 2:30 (i was early) in hopes that they might actually arrive by 3. finally Mani auntie came with the crap that we had to put on all the dinner tables, which we started doing.
around that time meera, nupur, priya, silkie (?), and some other girls whose names i don't remember showed up (carrying boxes from the Cheesecake factory, no less).
also a fellow soph from Memorial high school showed up, nikhil, bringing the total count of nikhils i know up to 243. no, i'm kidding, it's just 6 or so.
so i'm like, cool, i finally know someone here, cuz meera and nupur and priya go to hightower (even though i didn't really know them, i knew OF them), and nikhil was cool too, although hungry. all the time. and i mean ALL the time.
so what happened next...hm....right, so then the guys, meaning nikhil, me, and the adult guys went up to the rooms that mani auntie had reserved for us volunteers to change. finally when we got back downstairs, they had food for the volunteers; some really kickass stuffed jalapenos that challenged even MY taste buds. wow...freakin' awesome. (there was more food too; the jalapenos just stick out in my memory)
so then i'm hanging around the stage with this guy who's like in his forties or something and who manasy said is with me helping with audio/visual crap. the audio DJ/mixer guy was named nadeem; he was pretty good.
then the a capella group from UT showed up, they're called HUM (click HERE for a link to their website, buy a CD) don't ask me why it's all in caps...it just is.
so they're pretty cool; i helped nadeem hook up their mics and crap. one of the singers says she knows me from somewhere; she looked familiar too, just can't place her face...hm...
so i ended up going to Mokund (?) uncle and asking what i'm supposed to do; he told me to keep the singers happy; which was perfectly fine by me, they're cool ppl. so i ended up putting them in the side room where the volunteers had eaten to hang around; then everyone seemed to forget about them until they were supposed to sing, at which point i had to dash backstage and around tables to get them...
but i'm getting ahead of myself.
next what happened was meera swiped us (me and nikhil) to help with flower arrangements. FLOWER ARRAGEMENTS. of all things...yeesh. nupur was showing us how to do it when nikhil got a cell phone call and left (he never came back) and i managed to sneak out too (sorry nupur...lol)
so that guy i was hanging around with? his name was like akshay (?) uncle or something like that...i only found out MUCH LATER that he was NUPUR'S DAD!!! i would've watched what i was talking about...yeesh again.
we found out that nupur's little sister goes to dulles middle school where she's taught by ellen townley, who's MY private viola teacher, so it's a small world after all, yadda yadda yadda....etc.
so next we have the thing starting and crap. ppl are getting drunk on whiskey in the lobby while i was running around doing all that stuff that i mentioned before...
finally we let them into the ballroom. they found their tables and stuff. apparently there was a big fuss about registration cuz there were so many ppl who just randomly CAME without telling us...but you'll have to ask one of the fish girls about that; i wasn't there.
so HUM performed...they're REALLY good...wow...i bought a cd for $5...definately worth it. (listening to it all weekend + today)
let's see...what's next...?
right, so then me and rest of kids are sitting around and eating dinner (FREAKING DISGUSTING) and after that was ice cream cake. then they started playing more dance-ish music and the OLD PEOPLE STARTED DANCING...SO SCARY!! someone said that she hoped they didn't get a heart attack...i concur...yeesh!
plus a bunch of them were half-drunk...including Mokund uncle, a VOLUNTEER! he was dancing with his whiskey, no less. so weird.
so Manasy wanted us kids to dance to get them started, but we figured they were already pretty well started (and they were) so we were just hanging out and doing random hindi dance stuff on the side...WISH WE HAD DANDYAS THERE!! nikhil and i tried to do dandya ras with our hands...didn't quite have the same effect (lol!).
slow-dance music came on...i had the extremely strange experience of seeing two girls DANCE AS IF THEY WERE LESBIANS!!! i'm still not sure that they AREN'T!
learned how to slow-dance (thanks nupur and meera!), so now i PROBABLY won't trip over my own or other people's feet..yay!
we slowdanced for a bit until faster music came on. by this time more ppl had left and the dance floor was clear enough for us (and three ppl from HUM) to do the 12-step garbah dance thing around the floor...fun, 'cept i kept on getting screwed up 'cuz they started on an off-beat.
tired and exhausted, but having just had the most fun i'd had all year, i headed down to the lobby to meet my mom who was picking me up (because SOMEONE couldn't take me HOME!...jk)
so peace ya'll....pratham gala was really fun...and i even left out a lot...
i was there for a grand total of 12 HOURS...wow...
catch ya'll later.

P.S. leave a comment! (click where it says 'comments')

May 17, 2004

wow...

pratham gala 2004 update still coming...someday...

but in the meantime take a look at this:

CLICK HERE

have fun

P.S. here's another hilarious link; courtesy of pk:
NOW CLICK HERE
freaking hilarious!

May 16, 2004

Woo Hoo!

So I'll post soon about the Pratham Gala 2004, but in the meantime let me just say GO BLOGGER!!! for making these new templates and for adding comment support! that's right, you can insult my posts quicker, easier and faster now...in other words, there goes my tagboard.
also, you can now update your blog via email...it's pretty cool!
'til next time...

P.S. each post now has its own page, on which it displays the comments and such. it's great cuz you can link to individual posts now...let's see xanga top THAT!

May 4, 2004

The Music Link

So I've realized that for some strange reason I associate people, objects, events, etc. with music. There's usually a story behind it too.

My sister: Matchbox 20 - Bright Lights
She and I are just turning down our street (she's driving) when this song comes on that we both like, but neither of us knows what it is. So we drive around our neighborhood for the next five minutes until it's done, then we went home and both rushed to the internet to find the name. It took a little while, but it was Bright Lights. Then we, uh, procured a version of the song.

Colin: Eagle Eye Cherry - Save Tonight
That guy can sing, even though it doesn't seem like it. This is the only song I've heard Colin sing.

Jordan: Dispatch - Two Coins
I just emailed her this song recently; she downloaded it and was trying to play it when this person in a chat room she was in started playing rap, so Jordan thought that I had emailed her rap music...she got it working eventually.

Ha: The Violet Burning - I'm No Superman
This song was on my blog, and apparently she used to go and listen to it all the time. I finally burned it on a cd for her. I'm just waiting until she gets tired of it, but that doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon.

When I think of more, I'll post them. The links are in my mind; I just have to hear the song somewhere first.

Another note:
My DBQ essay ended up to be SIX FULL PAGES, double-spaced. That's the best report I've ever written. Check out this sentence:

"Although Rhodes is quite biased toward England, one can analyze his justification of imperialism through English nationalism to uncover the core cause of the nineteenth century British obsession with colonization; they believed that it was their 'creed…dream…and mission.'"

It's just awesome! I didn't plan it that way; I wrote it and then I'm thinking "That's freaking unintelligable!".

It's the debate influence, I know.


Apr 30, 2004

There Goes the Neighborhood

What's happened to the world these days?

Take, for example, Cracker Jacks. They used to be in cardboard boxes with actual prizes, like rings and crap. They were so cool! When I was in elementary school, that's all I ever played with. And then sometimes you'd stumble across one of those 'special' boxes. You know, the ones filled with the white powder and money? Those were great, too! For some reason, my mind links those special boxes with the best times of my life. Like that time we set the neighbor's cat on fire. Or that car that we stole and drove into our house. Those were the days...

But now they have stupid little foil packages like chips or something. I'll bet they aren't even covered with caramel anymore! It's probably just brown paint and sugar. And now they only have dinky paper things for "prizes". What kind of prize is that? They just have mind puzzles and crap! What's up with that?

So there you have it. Irrefutable* proof that our world is going to the dogs.

*Vocabulary word

Apr 29, 2004

The Bubble Theory

Probably no one remembers my "Know Yourself" aphorism for life. It just means that you should know the real reasons that you do things.

Anyways, so I accidentally poked Ha the other day, and she got all freaked out, because I went through her little 'bubble' thing. And that set me wondering...do we have mental bubbles as well?

I think we do. They are mental shells, one inside the other, that go down and down until you reach your inner center. Mine (that I've been able to identify), are:

Everyone - This is for people whom I don't know.
Friends - Anyone whom I've talked to and know their name, essentially.
Close Friends - People that I've known for a relatively long amount of time, and who I can generally trust.
REALLY Close Friends - Only two or so people in this catagory. I would trust them with anything.
Family - my family
Myself - this is where my consciousness actually is
Inner Center - This is my subconscious, I guess, or whatever you want to call it. It is this part that I refer to when I say "know yourself". I think that here, at your inner center, are all your true feelings and emotions. It is very difficult to talk to yourself, simply because we lie to ourselves much of the time.

More on this later.

Peace.

Apr 24, 2004

Yet Another "10" List

10 possible sequel titles for Finding Nemo:

1. Finding Nemo Jr.

2. Grand Theft Nemo II

3. Finding Nemo 2: The Revenge of Dr. P. Sherman

4. Finding Squirt

5. Finding More Ways To Show Off Our Really Good Graphics Engine And Water Effects

6. Finding Nemo Volume 2

7. Losing Nemo

8. Finding Nemo 2: Bruce Is Hungry

9. Sleeping With The Fishes

10. Found Nemo

Apr 9, 2004

The Blogster Awards! - Finished At Last...Drive Safely!

[Joy's Blog Awards are here]

And thereby shall the Blogster Awards commence!

The Blogster Awards are over. Thank you all for coming, and have a great evening!


The nominees for Funniest Blog are...
Knurd Unit
Group blog made by Joy, Nirav, Pranay, Maerilly, and Sarah. Its theme is a stange mix of nerdiness and ghettoness. Enhanced by a picture of a rare herd of rapper-nerds.
PK1013
Pranay's Sonic-themed Xanga site. Although slightly messy, it is updated fairly regularly with hilarious happenings in Pranay's life. Also visited periodically by the Demotivators.
Megatorpoki's Fwoosh!
Azam's oddly Pokemonized journal. Can usually be counted on for something insightful and revealing. NOT! Actually, it's usually got something completely irrelevant and humorous. That's why it's in the Funniest Blog catagory, you idiot.
And the Blogster for Funniest Blog goes to...
PK1013
You have to acknowledge the total funny randomness in his xanga. Congratulations on winning the first Blogster ever.

The nominees for Most Serious Blog are...
It's All Relative
Joy's blog. Sometimes has lighthearted posts, but more often than not discusses deep topics like dating and friendship. Often makes you appreciate something you used to take for granted, or think about something that never struck you before.
Life...a Sitcom
Ha's newly-skinned blog. Again, is sometimes lighthearted, but many posts are evidence of her truly insightful mind.
Inside MY Head
By Barira Munshi. Discusses topics that are very close to her heart, but can still be understood and related to by everyone, at least in one aspect.
And the Blogster for Most Serious Blog goes to...
Life...a Sitcom
Because it just is. The most serious blog, that is.

The nominees for Best Layout are...
Knurd Unit
By Pranay, Nirav, Joy, Maerilly, and Sarah. Used to have a pretty gay template (literally; there was a picture of two naked men hugging), but now it's all cool-looking. Extra points for the Photoshopped nerd heads on rapper bodies.
Purity is a Myth
Lucky's blog, nominated by Maerilly. Everything seems to fit perfectly into place, although the whole place seems a bit like a hospital for lack of color. Nice scrolling list for blog links.
Every instance spent with you is never null moment.
Regan's blog. I'm not sure if that's the title, but it's very punny. This blog gets nominated just for the great sketch at the top of the page.
And the Blogster for Best Layout goes to...
Purity is a Myth
Despite Sarah's threat to dismember me if I didn't let her win this one, the Blogster has to go to Lucky.

The nominees for Best HTML Use are...
PK1013
Pranay's xanga seems to always have random experiments with html hanging around. It's like a fortune cookie of coding; you never know what html weirdness you'll find.
No Pretense
An odd title for Maerilly's xanga, but nevertheless contains excellent html work. Every time you visit there is usually something new floating around, singing, scrolling, or popping up.
Knurd Unit
Yet again, the blog by Pranay, Joy, Maerilly, Sarah, and Nirav gets a Blogster nomination. Every aspect of this blog is infused with strange and wonderful html-ing.
And the Blogster for Best HTML Use goes to...
No Pretense
So...many...special...effects...

Now we're going to have some special awards, for which there are just going to be winners and no nominees:
And the Blogster for...
...Smiley-est Blog goes to...
Megatorpoki's Fwoosh!: An average of 23,500 smilies per post.
...Least Updated goes to...
*sUpEr SaRaH*: Expect around one post a decade.
...Most Often Reskinned goes to...
Life...a Sitcom: Approximately 240 times within the past week.
...Most Updated goes to...
Megatorpoki's Fwoosh!: Updated somewhere around twice a minute.

To Rhyme

Joy's been making poems about everyone, so here's a taste of her own medicine...

Oy Itz Joy

Joy Chou is a stinky poet,
Her poems and rhymes completely blew it;
She hits people on their arms and shoulders,
"STOP YOU FREAK!" we all have told her;
If you talk to Joyful Chouwder,
You'll get used to speaking louder;
SillyDucky is her screen name,
Everybody thinks it sounds lame;
I think Joy got her brain a bit late,
But my lovely wife is actually great.

Apr 8, 2004

PWN4G3

*Sigh* just reminiscing about TMSCA State some more.

I remember one time when Mr. Trinh, Tram, Daniel, Mr. Cantu, Andy, and I were playing VC in one of the rooms. We were taking turns trading in and out; the two losers went out. At one point when I was out, Pranay, Neil, and Shalin came in. Because there were now a lot of us not playing, I suggested starting another game. Mr. Trinh said, and I quote, "Naah, this is where the PROS play, Nirav. What's the matter? Can't hang with us?"
So I didn't say anything, and the next game I was in. The others had gone ahead and started the other game in the room next door.
That next game I came in first, and Trinh was last. He got up, and mumbled something about checking in on the other room.
I said loudly, in triumph, "What's the matter, Mr. Trinh? I thought this is where the pros play! Huh? HUH?"
He just left.
It was sweet, very, very sweet.

Apr 7, 2004

The Duck Attack

The other day, when I came back from my viola lesson, I went out to the lake near my house to relax, and to talk to someone on my cell phone.
I was walking toward the bench next to the lake, when a feathery missile hurtled past me. It was a duck. The freaking duck had attacked me, missing by mere centimeters.
Later, while I was talking on my phone, another duck (or possibly the same one) began to approach me from the lake. It was just waddling toward me, quacking every few steps.
All in all, it was seemed remarkably like a teacher of mine (whom I will not name here).
It got to within about a foot of me, at which point I fled to the relative safety of the other side of the bench, fearing that it would produce a machine gun, or perhaps a spool of piano wire from beneath its wings.
There's something about these ducks at our lake that's really creepy. A year or two ago, I was going for a walk around the lake at around nine or so. It was dark, and all I had was a penlight on my keychain. The ducks were all on the lake, sleeping.
Or so I thought.
As soon as I passed the large, dark, mass of fowl, they awoke, and began to silently follow me.
They were led by the Grey Duck, a huge monstrosity of a bird who looked as though she was perpetually mad at everyone and everything.
Even in daylight, she was scary, charging at anyone who approached her domain (which was really the entire lake).
But here, at night, it was downright terrifying. They moved in concert down the lake, keeping pace with me precisely.
Eventually they lost interest, or at least appeared to, but I had a feeling the the Grey Duck had sent a few duck commandos after me, darting from tree to tree behind me.
On my way back, I was walking home on the other side of the lake, and it is a truly chilling sight to see about thirty or forty ducks detach themselves from the opposite side of the lake, and move, army-like, inexorably toward you.
I stopped to watch, rather like a deer stops to admire the headlights of the 18-wheeler barreling toward it. Taking out my penlight, I played it over the dark, feathered, mass drifting slowly toward me.
It seemed to my slightly nervous mind that they were glaring at me.
The newspaper headlines ran through my mind:

Boy Disappeared Near Lake, Bloody Feather Found
Investigators Finally Get Lead On Duck Mafia


As the ducks hit the water's edge, they began to scramble out of the water. A small group accumulated on the edge, then they all began to move towards me.
That's when I started to walk faster, into the dark night.

So anyways, long story short, I just barely escaped. I am definately never going for a walk at night again. They missed me once. They won't miss again...

Apr 4, 2004

Congratulations to those people who did good at UIL District!
And to those of you who didn't do so well...you already know you suck.
No, seriously, good job to everyone who went. Special congrats to Pranay, Anu, Stacy, Rupak, Spandana because they actually won stuff. Good luck to everyone going to regionals!

Oh yeah, I guess I'd better say something about Ha, because she's going to regionals for L-D after her first year of debate. All I have to say is, it's all my doing, because I wrote both her cases, plus prepping her for the tournament.
Okay fine, I just wrote her cases.
Okay, just the aff one.
All right, I just helped her with it.
Fine, I just made fun of her via my cell phone while she wrote her case with no help whatsoever. I probably made it worse rather than better.
Happy?

Anyways...good job and good luck to UIL people.

OH MY GOD!!!

So here are Pranay and me, playing cards. We're at the house of a neighborhood mutual family friend; our parents are chatting with them, so Pranay and I are bored.
My back is to the glass door to the backyard, and we're playing ERS. I'm losing, and then suddenly Pranay, who's been looking out over my shoulder into the yard, starts laughing and telling me to turn around.
"Yeah, right!" I'm not falling for that one.
"No really! Look!"
I follow the line of his finger and there, in the house behind, on the balcony, is this guy in a muscle shirt and jeans, and he's completely bending over a big flowerpot or something, presenting us with a beautiful view of his backside.
OH MY GOD!!!!!!!
It was hilarious. Then he went inside the glass balconey door, and we couldn't see him for a while. Between laughing so hard our stomachs hurt, Pranay and I started playing again, but we both kept on looking back, and then our hopes came true. He came out again, and bent slowly over another flowerpot.
It was like he was TRYING to give us a show or something.
Then he goes back inside, carrying the flowerpot.
After we recovered from this one, I tossed a small salute in the general direction of the backyard.
Then, as if to oblige me, he appeared right behind the glass door, and, from a sideways angle this time, bent over again!
It was hilariously traumatic, to say the least.
...whew...my sides hurt from laughing.

Will Make Buddy Icon For $$$

So, I'm making animated buddy icons for people. I think they're pretty cool.
Anyways, I need money, so now it's $2 per icon. You can IM Joy or Ha if you want to see what I've made.

Apr 3, 2004

Vibrrrrrrraaatoh!

On Wednesday, the drama people performed their UIL One-Act Play for the school during second period. Although I wanted to go, I couldn't, because second period is orchestra, and Mr. Soto had hired a clinician to come in and give us the help we so desperately needed.
The lady who came in was Korean. Her name, as far as we could make out, was Ms. Pizz. How much more musical can you get?
My first impression was that of a mime. She had so much makeup on that it looked rather like a mask over her face.
But Ms. Pizz was anything BUT a mime. She talked constantly, and she had this way of making weird jokes, then laughing, or rather, cackling, at them, then suddenly getting serious again. Here's something she actually said:
"This is beginning! It is most important! I tell my students, I say, get beginning and end correct, don't care about middle. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, but anyways..."
And then she'd continue on with what she was saying. It was like she was schizophrenic or something.
And another thing: she told Mr. Soto, and us, that she didn't want to conduct us; that was Mr. Soto's job. But whenever she'd tell him to start, after two or three measures, she'd either:
A. Shriek so loud that our strings spontaneously detuned, and make us stop and do something over.
B. Step directly in FRONT of Mr. Soto and take over.
C. Dance around behind Mr. Soto, conducting us herself.
The last one was the worst. She'd bob slightly up and down on her knees, and conduct in little jerky motions. But the worst part was, she'd be going at a completely different tempo than Mr. Soto. Then after a few measures:
"AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! STOP STOP STOP!!!!!!!! You all go at different tempo. This half goes at this tempo, and other half goes at other tempo. You must watch Mistah Soh-Toh!"
I wanted to scream, "IT'S BECAUSE HALF OF US ARE FOLLOWING YOU, LADY!!!!"
But I didn't, of course.
Don't take this the wrong way; I'm not criticizing her. We did get a lot done. And she's definately not as strange as the man who does the string orchestra sectionals at Houston Youth Symphony and makes bird-like spasmatic motions with his head when he plays.
Yet...
Anyways, she did get really into her job. She started chugging down water by the gallon, it seemed, and wiping off sweat every few seconds from her forehead. Her makeup mask began to dissolve and run down her face, making her even weirder-looking than before.
Now I know why some people are afraid of clowns.

Mar 29, 2004

A Funny Thing Happened To Me On The Way To School...

go here
Well, there you have it. As many of you have hoped for months, I've finally lost my mouth.

note: sorry, the link only works sometimes. just keep trying it; i'll put it up on angelfire whenver i get around to setting up my account. later.

Eat Less, Be Hungry

A recent CNN.com report talked about a study entitled “Eat Less, Live Longer.” These seem to pop up everywhere, you know? “Exercise More, Live Longer”, or “Eat More Calories, Become More Caloric”, or perhaps “Eat More, Become Bigger”.

In any case, the study was on a group of mice that apparently hung around with an even age distribution until researchers picked them up for tests. The interesting part was that, quote: “Even older mice on restricted diets fare better in research.” According to Dr. Spindler, a 19-month-old mouse is equivalent to a 60 or 65-year-old human. This is roughly one mouse week per human year, and raises some important questions like:

1. Do mice have 40-week birthday parties with gag cards that say things like “It’s your birthday, so I wish you luck” on the outside, and then on the inside say “You’re 40 (weeks). You’re going to need it”?

2. Do old mice reminisce about when they were little, and they had to steal cheese by hand, and didn’t get any of “them fancy trap-snappin’ contraptions” that young mice are so completely corrupted by nowadays?

I think these are questions that need to be thought about by American citizens, simply because they kill so many less brain cells than some current music which seems to consist of one note played repeatedly on a torched cat strung on a guitar.

At the end, the article, of course, claims that aging may eventually be slowed down by taking a pill. I think all articles about medical advances say that nowadays.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to go help my mice put on their dentures.

Mar 24, 2004

Weird, But True

It is a law in Singapore that:
"If you are convicted of littering three times, you will have to clean the streets on Sundays with a bib on saying, 'I am a litterer.' This will then be broadcasted on the local news."

The city of Gueleph, Ontario "is classified as a no-pee zone."

In Toronto, Ontario, "you can't drag a dead horse down Yonge Street on a Sunday."

"Residents are not allowed to have an Internet connection faster than 56k" in Uxbridge, Ontario.

In England "it is illegal to be drunk on Licensed Premises (in a pub or bar)", "any person found breaking a boiled egg at the sharp end will be sentenced to 24 hours in the village stocks", and of course "it is legal for a male to urinate in public, as long it is on the rear wheel of his motor vehicle and his right hand is on the vehicle."

Being more specific, in the city of Chester, "you can only shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow inside the city walls and after midnight", and in York, "excluding Sundays, it is perfectly legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and arrow."
Sounds kinda violent.

In Liverpool, "it is illegal for a woman to be topless in public except as a clerk in a tropical fish store."

Denmark: "One may not be charged for food at an inn unless that person, by his or her own opinion, is 'full'."

In South Dakota, "no horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants" and "it is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory."

Vermont law once said that "it is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole."

In the same token, in Florida "if an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle."

Also in Florida, the state constitution protects the rights of "freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages" and "a women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils."

Louisiana: "It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol."

Okay, that's all for today. Go to www.dumblaws.com for more...well...dumb laws.

Mar 23, 2004

Tabletop Discussion

In the University of Texas, San Antonio I found a stone table outdoors with this message scrawled on it:

- “The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person.”

Now, I was considering writing a serious column regarding the truth and falseness of this statement, and I would have too, had it not been followed by another statement, in different ink:

- “What if you love yourself?”

Then there was:

- “Narcissist?”

And:

- “Good f***ing point.”

Needless to say, the idea of writing any sort of serious work concerning this flew out the window.

And it really is a good point.

Mar 17, 2004

The Return of the "10" List

10 ways to know if you’re a nerd:

1. Your room contains more CDs than pieces of paper.

2. You’ve thought about installing cooling fans in your skull.

3. You refer to your computer as ‘she’.

4. You know the difference between ‘internet’ and ‘intranet’.

5. Your graphing calculator has more programs on it than your teacher’s computer.

6. You find yourself trying to hit control+Z in real life situations.

7. Your graphics card has a name.

8. You passionately support either ATI or nVidia.

9. You know what ATI and nVidia are and do.

10. People frequently call you ‘nerd’. *wink*

(note: I can poke fun at nerds because I know I am one. For me it was #10.)

Mar 11, 2004

A Post on Posting

I’m feeling a need to write, so I thought I’d open up Word and just let my thoughts flow.

Ha ha ha. No, seriously, people are pressuring me to write something and post it. Therefore, because I’m a spineless wimp, I’m going to try and be funny on command. At present moment I’m on instant messenger, and I just asked someone for a topic to write about. Instead, now we’re talking about the chemistry test I took today. Fat lot of help they are.

So perhaps I can talk about the fact that some people update their online journal with every single little thing that they do. Here’s a sample:

- I’m not doing much. Just sitting here.
[posted @ 8:30:33]

- I’m still here. Now I’m scratching my head.
[posted @ 8:34:19]

- Hey, I just inhaled really deeply. Let’s see if I can do it again!
[posted @ 8:35:28]

- Wow! I did it again!
[posted @ 8:35:39]

…and so on. The only limit to how much detail they include is how fast they can click the buttons to update their journal. Someone was telling me that “it’s the little things that count”, but really, do we have to know all the little things? I’m just glad that these people don’t have laptops, or we might get way too much detail about their lives.

As long as I’m being spineless and giving in to demands, I might as well write something about missy_ly, who requested that I write something about her, though she didn’t know what. So, here goes. For some odd reason, her cell phone number was on my phone before we swapped numbers. There. Happy?

If someone asked me for all my money and clothes right now, they’d probably get them.

I still don’t have a decent topic. Now my friend and I are talking about solar flares of the sixteenth century. Not even remotely humorous.

Anyways, since my Coke’s almost done now, and I’m getting bored, I’ll leave you all with a question:

What’s a good question to end this column with?